PICTURE THIS
(director/writer: Prarthana Mohan; screenwriters: Nikita Lalwani, based on “Five Blind Dates” by Nathan Ramos-Park and Shuang Hu); cinematographer: David Higgs; editor: Gary Doliner; music: Paul Saunderson; cast: Simone Ashley (Pia), Hero Fiennes Tiffin (Charlie), Luke Fetherston (Jay), Sindhu Vee (Laxmi), Nikesh Patel (Akshay), Anoushka Chadha (Sonal), Asim Chaudhry (Sid), Phil Dunster (Milo Bonner); Runtime: 101; MPAA Rating: NR; producers: Ben Pugh, Erica Steinberg; Amazon MGM Studios; 2025-UK)
“A film that I can’t picture without saying cheese.”
Reviewed by Dennis Schwartz
The disappointing, gimmicky, derivative, Bollywood rom/com, directed and written by the granddaughter of the famed Indian composer Ms. Vishwananathan, Prarthana Mohan (“Christmas is Canceled”/ “All For Her”), is based on the Australian film “Five Blind Dates.” Co-writer Nikita Lalwani keeps it sitcom friendly and uninspiring. Even a fine performance by Simone Ashley is not enough to save the film from not being pictured.
The 29-year-old Pia (Simone Ashley) is an artistic photographer running a struggling London portrait studio, who loses business because she refuses to photograph the popular item of passport photos. She’s best friends with her consoling worker, the witty gay man Jay (Luke Fetherston).
Pia’s high-maintenance younger sister Sonal (Anoushka Chadha) will marry soon in a traditional month-long British-Indian wedding held in the London suburbs. The overbearing mom of the daughters, Laxmi (Sindhu Vee), says she’s willing to give Pia a valuable family jewelry heirlooms if she marries one of the 5 fellows she arranges for her to go out with on a blind date. An astrologer predicts one of those men is just right for her. Pia agrees to these terms to appease her mom.
Unfortunately all the dates are bummers, like the one where the yoga guru Milo Bonner (Phil Dunster) annoyingly strums throughout the date a medley of Jason Mraz songs. Or the buffoonish Sid (Asim Chaudhry), son of a Bombay businessman, who acts like a twit.
Though there are a few lively scenes where Pia relates well to her ex-boyfriend Charlie (Hero Fiennes Tiffin, Ralph’s nephew), her true love who left her when they were high school students and is the best man at sis’s wedding.
But nothing is sustainable, meaningful or for that matter too amusing. It’s more a pleasant film than a good one, a film that I can’t picture without saying cheese.
REVIEWED ON 3/15/2025 GRADE: C+
dennisschwartzreviews.com