DR. GOLDFOOT AND THE BIKINI MACHINE

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DR. GOLDFOOT AND THE BIKINI MACHINE (director: Norman Taurog; screenwriter: story by James Hartford/ Louis M. Heyward/Robert Kaufman/Elwood Ullman; cinematographer: Sam Leavitt; editors: Fred Feitshans/Eve Newman/Ronald Sinclair; music: Les Baxter; cast: Vincent Price (Dr. Goldfoot), Frankie Avalon (Craig Gamble), Dwayne Hickman (Todd Armstrong), Susan Hart (Diane), Jack Mullaney (Igor), Fred Clark (Donald J. Pevney), Patti Chandler (Robot), Mary Hughes (Robot), Salli Sachse (Robot), Luree Holmes (Robot); Runtime: 90; MPAA Rating: G; producers: Samuel Z. Arkoff/James H. Nicholson; MGM Home Entertainment; 1965)


“A lame-brained comedy that might fly with viewers who are drawn to low-brow humor like flies to manure.”

Reviewed by Dennis Schwartz

An AIP tasteless comedy that’s silly but not funny. It has a few lively moments and one acceptable scene, the car chase through the streets of San Francisco at the climax. Director Norman Taurog (“Pardners”/”G.I. Blues”/”If I had a Million”)tries for a campy spy spoof and settles for a lame-brained comedy that might fly with viewers who are drawn to low-brow humor like flies to manure–the same fans of those lame drive-in flicks from the 1960s.

Mad scientist Dr. Goldfoot (Vincent Price) has created in his San Francisco lab a number of sexy female robots programmed to seduce wealthy men into marrying them and getting them to sign over to them their fortunes. Igor (Jack Mullaney), Goldfoot’s bumbling assistant, goofs and sends the robot named Diane (Susan Hart) to to the pauper Craig Gamble (Frankie Avalon) instead of to bachelor millionaire Todd Armstrong (Dwayne Hickman). Craig is Agent 00½ with the Security Intelligence Command and his Uncle Don (Fred Clark) is the section head of the spoof agency. When no one at the agency’s home front believes Craig’s tale of bikini clad robots as seducers, Craig follows his uncle’s suggestion and teams up with Armstrong to put an end to Goldfoot’s greedy criminal scheme.

The filmmaker cares little about the inane plot, but tries to make a go of it with its leaden physical comedy and slapstick. It shows some creativity with itsopening credits. Claymation artist Art Clokey designed the colorful visuals which play out with the background theme sung by Motown’s The Supremes! There are images of floating bikinis, molten gold forming the letters of the credits, and the clay-formed head of Vincent Price sliding around in a golden slipper.

REVIEWED ON 5/16/2012 GRADE: C-

Dennis Schwartz: “Ozus’ World Movie Reviews”

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